I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
