Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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