I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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