Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
