Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
