I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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