you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize