Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
worst night to have a conscience
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
