a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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