you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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