Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
