I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
