Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
