I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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