I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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