it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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