Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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