I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
