I think I am morally bankrupt
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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