wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Randomize
