My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
