I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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