it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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