I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
