she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
