a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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