I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
