I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
