put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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