you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
