Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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