don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Randomize
