Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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