Already got asked if we're dating
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
