every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Randomize
