This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
