We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Also, beer. Big fan.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
