You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
