Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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