I got chris browned last night
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
