vagina is talking i cant
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
