just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Randomize
