All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
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