wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
