Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
