You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
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