I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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