i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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