There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
