Buhtt sex?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
